Living Life in Between

Last night I heard a female guide to my left. I even got a glimpse of blonde hair. I didn't pay much attention other than to notice she was there and to hear her comment. I was feeling very blessed last night and thinking, "I am very blessed" and she said, "You have a good life" and nodded. I agreed and went on to enjoy the evening think about how wonderful of a life I have. For me to be in such a calm state is odd considering how hectic this week and last week have been. I don't know if Mercury is in retrograde or if I am just going through a transition period, but I have been very moody and negative about my life lately. It has been causing me to reevaluate everything and think about what it is that I would like to do next. Problem is, I am not really sure and even if I were, most of the things would be difficult to near impossible with two young children running around. I realized that I have really gotten everything I want in life when I have asked f...

My new guide seems to be all around me, but I am noticing that I turn to my left instead of my right now. Steven seems to be gone, but maybe he isn't. Maybe he is just gone for the time being. I keep remembering a night when I was sitting on my front porch taking in the evening silence. Out of the blue Steven said to me, "You will get a new guide soon". I looked to see if there was a guide there, but only felt a presence on my left and did not try to get to know who was there. The presence on my left disappeared soon after anyway, so I soon forgot about it. I paid little heed to what Steven told me. I have been told before about new guides. I figured this was no different. Steven was always there when the other guides came to help, so I didn't worry about him leaving. He has always been there when I look for him. Besides, I try not to put too much importance on who my guides are or where they are. I have noticed they switch quite frequently. Some I take time to ge...

I can't find Steven. Two nights ago I was outside sitting and taking in the cool breezes and silence and pondering over a strange feeling I have been having this week when I heard a voice say to me, "You are safe". The voice seemed to be coming from my left at first but when I focused on it more, it really just seemed to come from all around me. I was a bit worried because I thought it was a spirit just coming by to say hi and in the evenings I really prefer to have only my guides around me, it makes it simpler and less distracting. So I did as I usually do when I feel there may be more spirit around than I am comfortable with and said, "Only my guides and angels around me at this time". It always woks to say that. I again heard, "You are safe". The feeling I have been having this week - a feeling that something is different and changing around me in the world or perhaps even closer to home - had me on edge as it was, and now hearing this new voice...

I have spent most of the last nine years since my spiritual awakening trying to figure out if what I experience is real. I do this by asking others with similar gifts what their experiences are and tell them my own in hopes that they will recognize and validate my experiences. Problem is, when I tell them what I have experienced they will look  at me as if they are thinking, "You made that up". It has been difficult for me to find anyone who has had similar experiences to mine to the extent that they developed their abilities seemingly spontaneously with the help of their guide. It is even harder to find anyone with a close relationship with their guide. Either I find people who have nothing close to what I have or I find people who have completely lost touch with reality. I m beginning to think that maybe I will never find someone like me. The woman who emailed me a couple of days ago about needing help with her spiritual awaking (the one who lives in the same town as me...

I woke up this morning feeling odd. I recognized the feeling. It is the feeling that says, "Pay attention!" This time it was not really strong, just slightly there, but I felt it. When I focused upon it a bit more I could not tell if it was good or bad. Steven said, "It will be okay" like he normally does and I soon lost interest in the feeling. It wasn't strong enough to really warrant an all-out panic. The day went smooth without much incident. For me, working in a juvenile detention facility all day, this is something to celebrate. Each day without incident is one to smile about! When I got home I decided to check my email because my house was way too hot for me to start my normal exercise routine of step aerobics and weights.  I turned down the A/C and checked my email. Usually I get nothing but Facebook updates and other spam, but today I got two emails. One was asking for a mediumship reading and the other was asking for help on their spiritual awakeni...

Lately I have been really distressed about the state of the world. This happens to me sometimes and comes in phases. I will see the news or run into a particularly bad student at work and it sets me into a tailspin. I think, "This world is going to hell in a hand basket" or "What is the point?" Steven always says, "There is good in the world, too" and I almost always get the feeling that it was planned this way, that for some reason we, as spiritual beings, planned it this way. Yesterday I was reflecting upon my work. I work with students grades 6-12 and ages varying from 11yrs to 17yrs. They only come to me and the building I work in because they have been kicked out of school for one things or another. Sometimes they break the law, other times they have just gotten in trouble too many times. I have students who have never experienced childhood. Their parents either were not there or were too busy to tend to them. Some of my students have children of th...

I started back to work this week and my sleep issues disappeared as suddenly as they appeared. I am sleeping wonderfully. I am also having very vivid dreams. All week I have had these vivid dreams. They have a common theme: change and handling change. Last night's dream had a lot of water in it. Whenever I have dreams with a lot of water in them I know emotion is involved. In my dream last night there was a large pond in my back yard. I remember that the water was receding and then it would surge forward and then recede again. I watched it and even threw a baby toy into it and watched it disappear under the surface. Then the water receded again and I went out to retrieve the toy only to be overcome by the water which forced me to retreat. Strangely enough I was walking on this wooden grid rather than the bottom of a pond and I remember commenting that it was my "bed". It felt at times that I was becoming lucid in the dream because I would go from a dream-like state i...