Rain and Flooding

It's been a while since I have written. I just haven't felt the urge to. Plus, there really wasn't much to write about. I had a job interview yesterday which left me feeling so-so. I have no idea what the outcome will be and I am really not stressing over it. I have decided that I will be happy no matter the outcome. I just can't waste anymore of my energy worrying over it. I would love to be offered this job but there is part of me that does not like the idea and uncertainty of new job while I am pursuing my LPC. Rather than constantly be at odds with myself, I am just trusting that the universe will give me what I need. It is such a relief!

Spirit Woman

An interesting thing that has been happening the last couple of days is that I am being visited by a woman in Spirit. She touches my left arm at odd times. When she does this, my whole arm will tingle. I am familiar with the feeling and acknowledged it and it would go away. One time, I welcomed it and the feeling got more intense. I looked at her and saw a dark haired woman standing to my left. I asked her why she was there and she said, "You called me" and then I heard "Mary". She continued to come the next day and has also been around me today as well. She will briefly touch my left forearm as if to say, "I am here" and then, when I noticed it, she will stop. It kinda freaked me out a couple of times today because it makes me stop what I am doing because I get this feeling that I need to be prepared for something to come, but I don't know what it is. 

Difficulty Sleeping

Strangely, after so many nights of great sleep since dropping the too frequent nightly Benadryl and going cold turkey on caffeine, I had trouble getting to sleep last night. More than once during the day I kept getting this feeling that I needed to get ready to go back to work soon. I would actually follow the feeling, thinking to myself of what I needed to get done and how to prepare, etc. However, I would then realize that my return to work was not for another 3.5 weeks and I would stop my thoughts about enjoying my last few days of summer. After this happening for a third time I wondered if perhaps it was my intuition kicking in and that, perhaps, I really do only have a few days of summer left? With this thought I began to think about the "what if's" and day dream about the possibility that I would get a job offer soon and be required to go back to work before the first of August. This is definitely a possibility and considering it got me a bit wound up - in a good way. So, when I tried to go to sleep I was wide awake and could not get my mind to calm down. When I would finally get my mind calm, I would almost instantly feel my body relax and something about it would make me suddenly alert and I would be wide awake all over again. I don't think I fell asleep until 1a.m. I then got up at 6a.m. because I was wide awake thinking about my dreams. I eventually just got up because I planned on attending a weight circuit class at my gym at 8a.m.

Raining and Flooding

The dream I was considering this morning was yet another rain dream. It was raining hard and the sky was overcast. Instead of being depressed, however, I was excited. I recall being at home and calling my husband up on the phone and telling him that he needed to come home soon before the bridge flooded. In my mind as I spoke with him I could see the bridge and the rapidly moving muddy water under it. It was so close to the edge that it was soon to cover the bridge. The water, though muddy and moving swiftly, was contained within a concrete barrier and I knew that my husband and I were safe. I was thrilled at the rain and excited about all the changes going on as a result of it.

Later in the dream, I was at home with my husband talking about the flooding. I went outside to check to see if our stream was flooded (we don't have one in real life, though). I walked down to the stream and it was indeed flooded and the water was moving swiftly. Yet this water was weird. The outside was muddy but the inside was clear and I could see straight to the bottom of the stream bed.

When I awoke I kept feeling like it was raining outside and checked to see. There was no rain, of course, the dream was just very real.

Rain can symbolize many things depending on how it is perceived in a dream. In my dream, I believe the rain symbolized forgiveness, grace, fertility, renewal and good fortune. I felt excited and energized in this dream as a result of the rain pouring down around me.

Water represents the subconscious and emotional aspects of Self. In this dream there was flooding, muddy water but it was contained. To me, that is reflective of my emotional state - lots of emotions that are not always clear but are contained. Later in the dream, the water is still moving fast but is split between muddy and clear. This symbolizes that my emotions are clearing up and there is more certainty.

My mother told me today that she had a dream that her back yard was flooded and that the water was muddy and had intensely high waves. I guess whatever I am going through in my dream state my mom is also going through. I am glad my water never looks like tidal waves!

Calm

With the Spirit woman by my side I have been feeling calm. I don't know if it is directly a result of her being around or not, but it is comforting at least to know I am not alone. I am not really sure where the feeling is coming from but I felt it shift yesterday and it has continued in to today. Perhaps it is just that Mercury is not longer retrograde?






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